A Dedication To Gravitation
by Writing Tenshi
Summary: It's Christmastime in Tokyo, which means gifts and parties, and some various perspectives from characters who fall prey to gravitation (a little bit edited a few years later...)
1. On The Way

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 1: On The Way  
  
The sound of snow crunching underneath his feet made him smile and step even a bit livelier than normal. It had snowed two inches the night before, and the icy cold morning had turned that snow from soft, gentle powder into packed, crunchy ice. As he waited for the light to allow him to cross the intersection of one of Tokyo's busiest shopping districts, he bent down to touch the snow. Cold, but not completely frozen because it could melt at the slightest touch. Hard, yet flexible because you could change it. Yuki was a little like snow, he though. He decided not to tell him that thought because Yuki would only concentrate on the bad things of snow. "What? Too cold and harsh for you?" would most likely be the reply. So rather than share these thoughts out loud, he stood up and looked at his one and only lover, whom had very reluctantly come shopping with him.  
  
Yuki Eiri... Shindou Shuuichi was delighted that Yuki had come with him. Going shopping alone was, well, lonely, but also dangerous. Last time he had gone out he had been followed by some fangirls who wouldn't leave him alone. He had meant to get Yuki's present then, but buying a gift for a guy would only have made the girls ask more questions and pry into his personal life. Not just his personal life, but Yuki's as well. Shuuichi had grown a little more used to attention but he certainly didn't want to do anything that hurt Yuki.  
  
So today, Shuuichi was prepared. He had dyed his hair back to a natural looking black and had gotten it trimmed just a bit. K had said that was fine because they weren't going to be touring anytime soon and he didn't have to worry about "image" so much. He also dressed rather conservative today in a black jacket and red sweater. The sweater had been a present from Yuki after Shuuichi had complained about it being cold out alone on the couch. While a sweater wasn't was he had been hoping for, the idea that Yuki bought him something seemed just as good. As for Yuki, he looked as he did most days. He was dressed up, but in that loose sort of way that screamed sexy. He was also wearing sunglasses, despite the rather overcast skies.  
  
The light finally changed and a tinny chime filled the intersection to let people know it was okay to cross. Shuuichi ran across to the other side, his energy having been pent up for the roughly 30 seconds he had had to wait before being able to cross. When he turned around, he saw that Yuki had only gotten a third of the way across, so he was stuck waiting again.  
  
Yuki took his time. He always took his time. There was no sense in rushing anything, he reflected, except when there was a novel deadline fast approaching. It was often these stories that ended rather harshly. It was much easier to have a jealous lover murder their partner and explain in roughly two or three paragraphs the remorse they felt. Stories with happy endings took more time and were harder for the cynical Yuki to write about.  
  
"YUKI!!!!" Shuuichi yelled from across the street. But Yuki had no interest in speeding up and was now angered by the idiot who had called his name out loud in public. He got to the other side and scowled at his lover. Shuuichi's face immediately turned into big, tearful eyes knowing what would come next. Yuki sighed and muttered "idiot" quietly, but Shuuichi still heard it.  
  
"I know, I'm an idiot right? I'm sorry Yuki. I'm just excited and... and...." Shuuichi looked back down at the snow. Melts with a touch right? He grabbed Yuki tightly and apologized again.  
  
Yuki sighed and his scowl lessened. "Why are you always in a hurry? Are the stores going to close soon?" Shuuichi shook his head. "Are all the possible presents in the entire department store going to be sold if we don't run as fast as we can?" Shuuichi shook his head again. "Then quit being an idiot. I would have thought you would have wanted to make this trip last as long as possible." Shuuichi nodded and then realized was Yuki was saying in Yuki-talk. Yuki didn't mind being with Shuuichi on this shopping trip. He just couldn't say it aloud. Shuuichi smiled big and cheered.  
  
"I do! I do! I want to stop in every single section and look at everything! And I want to have lunch in that restaurant on the top floor! Hiro said he took his girlfriend there and it was really nice and romantic."  
  
"Ayaka-san." Yuki said bluntly.  
  
"Huh?" Shuuichi looked slightly puzzled.  
  
"You can say her name you know." Yuki pulled out a half-empty pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one up. They walked in silence for a couple blocks until Yuki spoke again. "How are they?"  
  
"Doing well. Hiro seems much more cheerful when he talks about her. He was trying to decide what she'd like for Christmas, but seeing that he doesn't know too much about her and they don't get to see each other very often, he's having a tough time."  
  
"Blue." Yuki said bluntly again.  
  
"Huh?" Shuuichi once again got that puzzled look on his face.  
  
"She likes the color blue. Aneki would buy her presents on my behalf when I was younger and she'd always pick out something blue, because it was a color she liked."  
  
"Yuki... I didn't know you cared."  
  
"Idiot. What makes you think I do care?" Yuki scowled again and took another drag off his cigarette. Maybe it was a mistake to agree to go shopping after all. Suddenly it seemed the day would be filled with Shuuichi talking nonstop about what he wanted to get for people. That in itself would be annoying. Shuuichi never talked about what he was hoping to get for Christmas from other people. He hadn't even suggested the idea to Yuki. All Shuuichi ever did was care and give. It was a puzzle to Yuki, who thought all people operated on some level of give and take. For instance, Yuki wrote tasteless romantic crap and young women all around the country paid for it, which funded Yuki's cigarette addiction. Yuki took another drag off his cigarette and for one very brief moment was thankful that young women in Japan were so needy.  
  
"OOH!!!! Look Yuki!! It's you! What's that one about?" Shuuichi pointed to a window display of books. Sure enough, it was a copy of his latest book "Tension". Selling for roughly 1600 yen, it was priced high enough to show he was a popular author, but low enough that the majority of school girls could buy it and every other book when it came out.  
  
"Nothing that would interest you. It's about girls." Yuki smiled with somewhat of a smirk at his lover. Shuuichi frowned and turned around to face Yuki squarely.  
  
"I like girls," he said defiantly. "It's just that I like Yuki better."  
  
"Yes, yes, I'm sure you do. Come on." Yuki grabbed Shuuichi by the arm and got them walking back towards the department store. He didn't want to be near the bookstore any longer, nor did he want Shuuichi getting into some gushy scene about him. They walked one more block and entered the large department store: Tower 54, named so because it had 54 various stores, restaurants, and so forth when it first opened. When the economic boom was at its peak, the store had expanded and now had roughly 150 places inside, but the name stuck.  
  
Shuuichi gazed in awe at how decorated everything was. Christmas was merely 10 days away, but the apartment Yuki and he shared was still as stark as ever. Yuki didn't own any Christmas decorations, which didn't surprise Shuuichi. But he was hesitant to buy any and put them up, lest he annoy Yuki more. The only luxury he had allowed himself was to buy two Christmas related pillows, which he had put on the couch. He used these when he slept on the couch some nights, so Yuki seemed to treat them more as "Shuuichi-clutter" rather than for Christmas. However, seeing the colors and lights and sounds of the department store made Shuuichi feel that he just had do something to decorate their apartment. It just wouldn't feel Christmassy at Christmas without them.  
  
Decorating would have to wait though. Right now, they were at the department store and it was time to find gifts. "Ne, Yuki, I want to find something special for Hiro and Maiko and Fujisaki and..." Shuuichi continued to rattle off names and Yuki looked at the exit door one last time, seeing the only escape from his prediction come true. He was jerked away from the door quickly as Shuuichi pulled him into the direction of the nearest toy store to find something special for a certain pink bunny.  
  
Next Track: Relatively Speaking  
  
Major changes and notes:  
Aneki is a way of saying older sister similar to how Tatsuha refers to Eiri as Aniki. The title of the book was changed cause I've noticed the titles of Eiri's books tend to be just one word.


	2. Relatively Speaking

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 2: Relatively Speaking  
  
The toy store was filled with mothers and their small children. Shuuichi and Yuki stepped gingerly past and over some of the ones playing with toys on the ground until they made their way to the girl's section, filled with stuffed animals, dolls, and all the necessary fashions and accessories. Shuuichi picked up a medium size teddy bear and gave it a few trial squeezes. "This is about the size of Kumagorou I think," Shuuichi happily exclaimed.  
  
"Kuma-what? Oh, that bunny thing..." Yuki looked uninterested as he turned his attention away from Shuuichi to survey their surroundings. Mika had never been interested in dolls when they were younger. Playing with baby dolls was supposed to bring out that nurturing, motherly instinct in young girls, and Yuki was sure Mika had none of that. From an early age, Mika had been more interested in her own fashion and looks. When other girls of her age would have been interested in visiting a doll store, Mika had wanted to visit the cosmetics counter at the department store. Thus, dolls and other toys were rarely found in the Uesugi household. Being in the toy store now made Yuki bitterly remember his childhood was different from most youth. It must have been completely opposite of Shuuichi's, he though, turning back to look at him. Shuuichi was always full of energy and emotion. He was so easy to please, yet Yuki could never find it in himself to completely satisfy what was wanted of him. Ever so briefly, Yuki thought maybe... maybe the reason he didn't satisfy Shuuichi was because if he did... Shuuichi might leave him. He couldn't deal with the pain that would bring. But this idea was in Yuki's brain for merely an unconscious moment. Reality had firmly taken Yuki into the present, a reality where a rather cute and childish looking Shuuichi was sitting on the floor, having ripped open a few packages of clothes in order to try them on the teddy bear. It seemed he was having trouble deciding what shirt would be best. Shuuichi was sitting on the floor and held up the two choices to Yuki.  
  
"Ne, Yuki, which do you like best? The white vest or the yellow t-shirt?" Shuuichi asked completely serious. Yuki found it almost laughable. It seemed very unlikely a stuffed animal would care what it was wearing. But Shuuichi seemed so serious and so adorable. Yuki leaned over and quickly gave Shuuichi a kiss. The idea of going a bit further right then and there in the store entered Yuki's mind but he was interrupted by the screams of a 31-year-old man with absolutely no sense of timing despite his profession.  
  
"OI!!!! SHUUUUUUIIIICHIII!!!" The owner of the voice came running to the back of the store carrying a few shopping bags and his precious Kumagorou balancing precariously on his head. It seemed unreal to consider that Sakuma Ryuuichi was over 10 years older than Shuuichi. Both had the same carefree mannerisms and even watching the two interact it was hard to tell who was older. "Hmmm...." Ryuuichi puzzled for a moment and carefully took Kumagorou off his head. "Kumagorou says the white vest looks best on teddy. Is he your new friend?"  
  
Shuuichi blushed and shook his head. "What are you doing here Sakuma-san?"  
  
Ryuuichi plopped himself on the floor next to Shuuichi and smiled big with rosy cheeks. "Ooooo, just some shopping. Tohma said I should pick out something nice for the Christmas party and now I wanna pick out something nice for Kumagorou too! It wouldn't be fair if I just shopped for myself."  
  
"Christmas party?" Shuuichi asked. Ryuuichi had already started rummaging through the doll clothes scattered on the floor, so Shuuichi turned around to ask Yuki.  
  
"Yeah, Tohma used to throw a big party every Christmas in the NG building but it's been awhile." Shuuichi wasn't sure... but somehow Yuki sounded a bit more perturbed than normal.  
  
"A Christmas Party huh?" Shuuichi started to get excited but Yuki's face made it very clear he wasn't interested in going. Shuuichi pouted a little. "But it's a Christmas party with friends! You lock yourself up too much Yuki. It'd be good if you got out a little."  
  
Yuki scowled. "Are you through here?"  
  
Shuuichi sighed. "Yeah, I'm done I guess." He carefully hid the white vest behind his back and waved goodbye to Ryuuichi with his free hand. "Bye Sakuma-san! See you at the Christmas party!"  
  
Yuki's eyes got wider and he frowned deeply at Shuuichi. "I'm not going!" He yelled a little more loudly than he would have liked. A few people in the store turned to look his direction but they quickly went back to minding their own business. He lowered his voice a little. "You might think it's all fun and games, but you aren't actually related to" Yuki stopped suddenly when he felt a familiar hand on his back. Seguchi Mika, with Seguchi Tohma trailing just behind.  
  
"Aren't actually related to who Eiri? You better not be thinking of skipping again this year. I'll report you to the police as a missing person if I have to." Mika subtly threatened Yuki with a smile. "Just think of all the fuss that would create in the media, hmmm?" Mika then gave a quick glance towards Shuuichi. "Shuu-kun, run along and give me some time alone with Eiri okay? I'll give him back soon."  
  
Shuuichi knew it would be wiser to leave Yuki alone with Mika and Tohma than to fight back. Today WAS supposed to be his day with Yuki but he knew that the only reason he could be with Yuki at all was because Mika and Tohma were leaving them relatively alone lately. He went to the register to purchase his gift for his idol Sakuma-san and left the store casting one last glance at Yuki. He was having some sort of argument with Mika again. When Yuki rejoined him, he was going to be in a bad mood. Shuuichi wondered if that would be a good time to either have lunch or let Yuki go smoke outside. Or maybe find a restaurant that would let Yuki smoke inside. Either way, they should serve beer too. Shuuichi sighed and decided not to worry about it. Now would be the best time to get Yuki's present. He had seen it and put it on hold weeks ago. Merrily, he made his way to the largest store in the mall.  
  
It was here where Uesugi Tatsuha had a part time job. It wasn't for the money, but merely for show. Working made him seem more responsible and allowed him to live in Tokyo on his own for a bit without Mika complaining. Plus, by working in a department store, he basically got paid to watch girls. When Shuuichi had been looking for ideas on what to get Yuki, Tatsuha suggested a new desk and chair for Yuki's office. The desk Yuki currently had was rather small compared to the black one he used to use. Not only was it more confined, but Tatsuha argued there wasn't enough room for Shuuichi to sit on it while Yuki was working. This "selling point" immediately led Shuuichi to agree with Tatsuha that Yuki needed a new desk and chair. They picked out a black one similar to what Yuki had before, except this one was a bit fancier. It had a built-in lighting and had more legroom for the taller-than-average Yuki. Shuuichi also tested out the matching chair, which was quite comfy and sturdy. Tatsuha said it would certainly be sturdy enough to hold if Shuuichi jumped into his Aniki's lap.  
  
So today, Shuuichi decided he would purchase the desk and chair. In return for showing him the wonderful present idea, Shuuichi would tell Tatsuha that Sakuma-san was in the toy store. Shuuichi walked around the store to the back customer service area. He politely requested the assistance of Tatsuha, but was disappointed to hear that Tatsuha wasn't working today. Shuuichi paid for the desk and chair set and asked for it to be delivered Christmas Eve. Wondering what to do next, he continued to wander around the store thinking of what he would pick up for his best friend Hiro.  
  
He had been best friends with Nakano Hiroshi for a long time. They both loved music and Nittle Grasper when they were younger. The idea of becoming pros had seemed like a faraway childish dream then. Yet, somehow, through ups and downs, and Yuki, and Ayaka, and records and concerts in live houses, they were still strong friends. It wasn't their interests that had kept them together. It was something else... some sort of pull that couldn't be explained....  
  
Shuuichi decided that he wanted to get his friend something different, something not related to their friendship or music at all. A gift certificate to a movie theatre would be a nice idea for him and Ayaka, but it didn't seem Shuuichi-ish enough. He wanted his gift to have thought. Shuuichi decided to sit down on a bench and he stared upwards, focusing his attention on the sky just visible through the glass ceiling of the shopping center. The weather looked like it was starting to clear up a bit. "Awwww," he uttered aloud. "I was hoping for more snow."  
  
"Me too," Hiro said. Shuuichi looked at his best friend and then continued to look back up at the sky. Hiro sat down on the bench next to Shuuichi and looked up like his friend. "So what's got you here today Shu?"  
  
"Christmas shopping with Yuki. But Seguchi-san and Mika-san have him for the moment. What are you doing here?"  
  
"Same thing. Trying to find Ayaka a gift."  
  
"Blue."  
  
"Blue?"  
  
"Yuki says she likes blue stuff."  
  
"And why would I care what Yuki thinks?" Hiro sounded a bit annoyed and looked at Shuuichi. "How would he even know something like that?"  
  
Ever protective, Shuuichi's emotions exploded out without warning. "He said Mika picked out stuff and YUKI ISN'T A BAD PERSON!"  
  
Hiro sighed. "Sorry, sorry"  
  
Hiro looked at his friend, who had his back slightly turned away and was still looking cross. He felt jealous. Shuuichi cared so much about Yuki now... and about music now... it felt almost as if Shuuichi had forgotten about him. Of course, Hiro himself was focused on being with Ayaka when he had a free moment. He was either on the phone with her or on the train to Kyoto to spend time with her if he had the chance. It seemed like their friendship should be stressed but they still stuck together.  
  
"So blue huh?" Hiro asked.  
  
"Yeah." Shuuichi didn't look so cross anymore. He rarely stayed mad or upset at anyone or anything very long.  
  
"Blue what?"  
  
"Hey, I already gave you one hint, I think you could figure the rest on your own." Shuuichi teased him.  
  
"Hey! I bet you didn't even pick out Yuki's present by yourself and you've been with Yuki longer than I have been with Ayaka!" Hiro laughed. Shuuichi tried to act indignant, but it was true that Tatsuha had basically picked out the gift. Suddenly he wondered if giving Yuki a desk was a good idea after all. Didn't he want to pick out a gift that really showed Yuki how he felt?  
  
"I gotta go Hiro!" Shuuichi quickly stood up and started running. "OH!" he called back. "There is going to be a Christmas party in the NG building!"  
  
Hiro yelled back. "I know! K already told us about it yesterday morning but you were so late you didn't get to hear about it!"  
  
Shuuichi blushed and waved goodbye, running back through the department store to find a more suitable gift for Yuki.  
  
Next Track: Regarding a Past and Regarding a Future  
  
Major Changes and Notes:  
In little ways I'm changing the timing of the story so that the relationship has been around longer than it could be implied by the original version. It helps explain certain things better and allows Yuki to be a bit softer than in the early stages of their relationship! 


	3. Regarding a Past and Regarding a Future

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style. As a special note for this Track, I don't know how all the characters met and sometimes there is very little information so... just sit back and enjoy.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 3: Regarding a Past and Regarding a Future  
  
"What's all this talk about Eiri?" Mika was roughly a half foot shorter than Yuki, but her attitude and stature made it obvious who was the older sibling.  
  
Yuki gave a brief disgusted laugh. "Talk about what Aneki?"  
  
"I think you know what I'm talking about."  
  
"I never know what you are talking about because it's generally lies."  
  
Mika stood ready to slap her younger brother right there in the toy store in front of everyone but a steady hand from her husband Tohma made her think better of it. She put her hand down and gave Yuki a disgusted look instead.  
  
"Now, now," said the blonde with piercing black eyes. "Why don't we talk about this over lunch?"  
  
"Can't. I have plans." Yuki said briskly and started to make his exit. Tohma grabbed him by the arm firmly. He wasn't strong looking but that never mattered when dealing with Eiri. He used his other hand to make Yuki's eyes meet his own.  
  
"We need to talk Eiri." His voice left no room for negotiation or disobedience. It wasn't just the voice of a "brother-in-law"; it was the voice of somebody who had cared for him for many years. Yuki looked away, but he didn't motion to leave.  
  
"Good!" Tohma said cheerfully and smiled. "Since you have plans for lunch, we'll just go have a drink then, okay?" He linked arms with his wife and turned around to face Ryuuichi, who was still sitting on the floor with Kumagorou. Kumagorou had made friends with Mr. Teddy Bear. Mr. Teddy Bear thought the green floral dress would look good on Kumagorou, but Kumagorou insisted he was a boy bunny and needed a tuxedo instead. So Mr. Teddy Bear rummaged around a bit more and found a tuxedo, but it was the wrong size for Kumagorou. Kumagorou seemed to be getting rather impatient. This impatience was mirrored in Ryuuichi's face. Tohma gently picked a nice looking sweater off the rack and handed it to Ryuuichi.  
  
He was used to his friend's innocent way of acting after knowing him for so many years. Without Ryuuichi, there probably wouldn't have ever been a Nittle Grasper or NG Records. Tohma's current life was partially indebted to Ryuuichi, which is why he never questioned or insulted his friend and his bunny. It was actually due to Kumagorou that Tohma had met Ryuuichi.  
  
Tohma was in his early 20s, playing a one-night gig as a fill-in keyboardist for a fellow musician. He was unfamiliar with the area, let alone the bar. When he first showed up, the bouncer had refused to let him in because he looked too underage with his baby face looks. He had to go call his friend from a nearby payphone to come out of the bar to let him in. After their short gig, the staff was cleaning up and one of the girls came across a pink bunny. Tohma picked up the toy and gave it an once-over. It looked well loved and something probably cherished by a child. He had momentarily considered asking for the bunny to give to Eiri as a small present, but somebody came rushing into the bar.  
  
"OI! Ryu-baby!" yelled the bartender. "You seemed to have forgotten somebody."  
  
This "Ryu-baby" person ran over to Tohma and snatched the bunny out of Tohma's hands. "Oh Kumagorou! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!" He started crying and then sat down at one of the stools at the bar. He positioned the bunny to be sitting in front of him, but in such a manner that Tohma could swear the plush rabbit was truly upset at being left behind. "I'm such a forgetful idiot Kumagorou! I'll never ever do this again, I swear." He then hugged the bunny and cried happily. "I'm so glad you forgive me Kumagorou. Let's go home."  
  
"Just a second Ryu" the bartender stopped him. "It's too dangerous for you and Kumagorou to be walking around in the dark in this neighborhood by yourselves. Let me call you a cab." It was obvious the bartender knew the young man. In a few moments, a cab came and took him away. Tohma sat himself at the bar. "Hey Master, who was that guy with the bunny?"  
  
The bartender smiled. "That, my friend, is none other than Sakuma Ryuuichi and his Kumagorou. I can't believe you are asking me that question. I thought you were a musician."  
  
Tohma blushed. "I play keyboard alright, but I'm not from around this section of town. Is he popular?"  
  
"They call him a genius. He was singing for a crowd before you showed up tonight. The place was packed with people. I hear his manager is looking for a steady keyboardist to play with him though. Maybe you should contact him. You didn't sound half bad tonight."  
  
Steady work sounded appealing....but he was more interested in learning about this interesting Sakuma fellow. A genius vocalist with an odd affection for a stuffed rabbit. Not only that... but something about his eyes. Those misty purple eyes sent tiny chills down his back despite the innocence on the surface. The very next day Tohma got in contact with Sakuma Ryuuichi and eventually created the pheonemon called Nittle Grasper.  
  
Nearly ten years later, Tohma was still looking into those misty purple eyes and feeling chills. He knew his friend's innocence, but always kept in mind that that innocence was masking somebody who knew far more about the world than Tohma ever would. It was that attraction that kept Tohma by Ryuuichi's side, and why Tohma hadn't hesitated when Ryuuichi asked that they put Nittle Grasper back together.  
  
"Ryuuichi, what about this sweater? It looks similar to the one Shuuichi was wearing today."  
  
Ryuuichi smiled and began putting the red sweater on Kumagorou. "Heehee, I bet it's the same one! Shuuichi is so tiny heehee... OH! That does look nice on you Kumagorou! I think we could get this one. Red is a Christmas color you know!" Ryuuichi stood up quickly and gathered his things, leaving a small mess of doll clothes on the floor. "I'm going to buy this and go home now Tohma. Thank you for today! It was fun!" Ryuuichi skipped off to the register. Tohma was glad Ryuuichi was taking his leave now. It made it easier to go to the bar with Eiri.  
  
Ten minutes later, after paying in polite apology for the mess left in the toy store, they found a suitable bar and seats around a table situated in a private back area that was more quiet. Not only did that mean they could hear each other, but today's subject matter was of a more personal matter, and it wouldn't do to have it spread across every major newspaper in Japan.  
  
"Eiri" Mika started out. Then she faltered. She couldn't seem to find the appropriate words and decided to spin her glass a bit and swirl the half melted ice cubes and liquor. Tohma picked up the conversation instead.  
  
"You know we don't think this relationship is healthy for you Eiri. You'll only end up hurting yourself more and more by staying with him."  
  
"And I think that I will only end up hurting myself more if I don't stay with him Tohma. It's not something I can explain. I know he annoys me beyond anyone else. I know he's why I continue to pop stress medication like candy. I know these things already Tohma, so I'd be quite obliged if you would just butt THE HELL OUT OF MY LIFE ALREADY." Yuki downed his beer and lit up a cigarette. Only 3 more left in the pack. Being around Shuuichi in the morning had caused him to go through half of it, but that was in a matter of a few hours. He had only been around Tohma and Mika for less than an hour, but had gone through nearly the same amount. He wondered if that was something Tohma would be interested in considering everything else in his life seemed to be the personal concern of his brother-in-law.  
  
"Eiri..." Tohma sounded slightly hurt, slightly wounded. It wasn't the voice of a brother-in-law anymore. It was the voice of a rejected lover. It made Yuki uncomfortable to hear it, especially in front of his sister. He glanced over to see if she picked up the same tone. If she had, she was ignoring it without any problems.  
  
"Don't Eiri me, Tohma" Yuki went on to say. "And I bet I know what this is about too. You read my book didn't you?"  
  
"I always read your books Eiri. "Tension" was a fine piece of work. But it's not the story I'm concerned about. It's the dedication."  
  
"So I decided to include a dedication in my book this time. Big deal. A lot of authors do it." Yuki waved his arm and somebody swiftly came to give him another tall glass of Budweiser beer. He took a sip and thought about how drinking beer was better at home, on the couch, served to him by a short, cheerful, hyper... He stopped his train of thought and took another gulp.  
  
"That's true, but you never have done a dedication until this book Eiri. And it's painfully obvious to anyone that knows you who that dedication is really for."  
  
"So what? Is it suddenly a crime to dedicate a book to someone?"  
  
"It's not healthy Eiri. You'll give him the wrong idea."  
  
"No, Tohma. Maybe I'll be giving him the right idea. It's just not one I can express out loud."  
  
Next Track: A Little Whipped Cream Never Hurt Anybody  
  
Major Changes and Notes:  
Once again, aneki is a term referring to one's older sister. Master is a title to refer to a bartender in Japan. Yuki talks too much in this Track but eh... it's just a story after all. 


	4. A Little Whipped Cream Never Hurt Anybod...

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 4: A Little Whipped Cream Never Hurt Anybody  
  
Shuuichi looked at his watch. He had left Yuki with Mika and Seguchi-san over two hours ago but he still didn't see them anywhere. Sure, it had been nice to quickly pick out a gift for Hiro and Fujisaki and Maiko and small presents for some of the NG staff, but he had come here to spend quality time with Yuki. It was so rare he could spend a whole day with Yuki and even rarer that Yuki would agree to spend it with him. It was nearly noon and Shuuichi's stomach painfully reminded him that it had been 4 hours since he last ate. He wanted to find Yuki fast so they could go eat.  
  
However, another part of him wasn't ready to meet up with Yuki yet. He still hadn't figured out what to give Yuki that would really show how much he cared. He'd checked all the stores. There were computer things, and book things, and writing things, and clothes, and all those other "normal" gifts, but nothing seemed special. Nothing seemed to say, "This is what you mean to me". Shuuichi wondered for a moment if Yuki would even really care if he got anything at all. He hadn't talked at all about Christmas, except to say that it was commercial and Western and if Shuuichi knew what was good for him, he wouldn't bake a Christmas Cake by himself.  
  
"Christmas Cake," he pondered out loud. Shuuichi bet he really could make a good Christmas Cake. He'd give him the present Christmas Eve just before Yuki went to bed.  
  
"Yuki!!! I want you to open this up now!"  
"You're so loud! I'm trying to go to sleep now. Can't you see that? Leave me alone."  
"But Yuki..." and he'd look at Yuki with tearful eyes.  
"Fine, if it will make you quiet." and then he'd open up the present and ask "Strawberries and whipped cream? What the hell am I supposed to do with this?"  
Shuuichi would giggle and say "You can make me your Christmas Cake silly." and he'd demonstrate by squirting just a little whipped cream onto the tip of his nose.  
------  
  
Shuuichi giggled at the thought. Yuki loved to play games, but somehow that didn't seem like an appropriate Christmas gift. He needed to get him something special that he could still open in front of everybody at the party. Shuuichi thought about song lyrics. Songs and poems always expressed how people felt! Then he frowned. Yuki had said he didn't have any talent when they first met. And Yuki was a writer, so he already had the upper hand. Anything Shuuichi wrote probably would sound a little childish. Besides, Shuuichi wasn't even sure how to express how he felt about Yuki. Sure, he loved Yuki more than anyone, but he couldn't figure out why. He was really cool looking; that was certain. But there was something more than that. Shuuichi seemed to constantly be holding onto Yuki to make sure he didn't slip away, but that wasn't the only thing holding them together was it? Wasn't there something more? It couldn't be just fate or destiny that had let them stay together. Even the media and Yuki's sister and Seguchi-san were opposed to their relationship, but that hadn't changed anything really.  
  
Shuuichi sighed again. Maybe he would be able to think better if he wasn't so hungry. He decided to take the elevator up to the restaurant level and wait for Yuki to show up. When he stepped out of the elevator though, Yuki was standing there waiting to take the elevator down.  
  
"YUKI!!!!!!!!" Shuuichi wrapped his arms around the tall blonde and placed his feet on top of his lover's. Yuki walked like this towards the restaurant not really looking down or acknowledging Shuuichi's presence. Shuuichi frowned a little, but enjoyed the ride into the restaurant. They sat down at a table with a view over looking the city. The weak sun had started to melt some of the ice on the streets below making it appear more slippery and dangerous than before. A waiter came by to take their order. Yuki ordered a latte and something odd-sounding and confusing, while Shuuichi picked spaghetti. It looked like the most normal thing on the list. Another waiter quickly came by to deliver an ashtray without Yuki saying anything. Shuuichi wondered if Yuki had been here before.  
  
"Ne, Yuki, what did Seguchi-san want?" Shuuichi asked hesitantly.  
  
"Nothing important. Mika just wanted to make sure I'm going to that damn Christmas party. Guess you got your wish after all." Yuki said sourly. It seemed like Yuki was hiding something, but Shuuichi decided not to push the issue.  
  
"Oh... okay. So what do you want for Christmas?" Shuuichi decided to cheerfully change the subject.  
  
"Peace and quiet." Yuki was definitely in a bad mood. However, he hadn't told Shuuichi to shut up or called him an idiot, so that meant he couldn't be in that bad of a mood.  
  
"I don't think I could give you that Yuki. It's not like me to be quiet. If I was quiet, wouldn't you be worried?"  
  
"No, cause the only time you are quiet is when you are sleeping and that's the best part of the day." Yuki gave Shuuichi another smirky smile. Shuuichi wasn't quite sure what to make of it. It seemed that sentence had a bit of double meaning to it.  
  
Their beverages and meals were stylishly delivered to the table. Shuuichi was pleased to see his spaghetti looked quite normal. Yuki's lunch looked a bit stranger. It was a soup, but there were weird looking things floating in it. Yuki noticed Shuuichi staring at his soup.  
  
"It's just soup for crying out loud. What's your problem?"  
  
Shuuichi looked away and decided to just concentrate on eating his spaghetti while silently cursing Mika and Seguchi-san. They had ruined his perfect day with Yuki!  
  
"Sorry." Yuki said quietly.  
  
Shuuichi looked at Yuki a bit shocked, not quite sure he had really heard what he thought he had heard.  
  
"I said I'm sorry, okay? Just... don't... I can't talk about it with you right now." Yuki looked bitter in a sad way and took another bite of soup. He couldn't tell Shuuichi what they had talked about, because that would ruin Shuuichi's perfectly planned Christmas gift. He had worked longer on writing a good dedication than he had writing the actual crummy novel. If that didn't mean anything... Yuki took another bite of his soup. "We're in a perfectly fine Italian restaurant and you order plain spaghetti. If you want spaghetti, I'll make it for you at home sometime."  
  
Shuuichi blinked. Yuki had gone through some strange transformation right in front of his eyes. He cursed Mika and Seguchi-san again, because to make Yuki nice meant they had done something really really bad. "Are you sure? I mean, you are busy and stuff working on your next book right? It's my job to cook dinner and do the laundry cause you're so nice to let me" he was cut off.  
  
"I said I'd make it so I'll make it." Yuki gave a heavy sigh and looked his lover straight in the eyes. He didn't want to be so harsh. He silently cursed Mika and Tohma for ruining his mood. The rest of the meal was fairly straightforward chatter from Shuuichi. He talked about meeting Hiro and that Hiro was thankful for Yuki's advice. He talked about the decorations and the music in the different stores. And while he talked, he looked so lit up and sweet and innocent, just like the angels Shuuichi was so animatedly talking about at the moment. Apparently a Christmas tree had been set up in the lower floor with a stunning angel on top. Shuuichi was going on and on about the angel and Yuki wanted to force him to be quiet, but in a way quite similar to what he thought about in the toy store. Unfortunately, that still wasn't an option, so Yuki used what he had at his disposal.  
  
"Here, try some of this," he said passing the latte across the table. Yuki hadn't tried it yet, so the lavish toppings were still intact. It had a variety of colored sprinkles of dark chocolate, white chocolate, and caramel on top a cute mound of whipped topping. Shuuichi wasn't very fond of coffee, but the whipped topping was hard to resist after his earlier daydreaming. He took a small sip and ended up getting a small portion of whipped cream on the tip of his nose. He was about to wipe it off, but noticed Yuki was smiling at him.  
  
Yuki leaned over the table and gently moved Shuuichi's hand away from his nose. Then he gently kissed Shuuichi's nose, carefully licking the whipped cream away. The skin tasted slightly sweeter than normal. Yuki realized it had been almost a week since he had tasted that sweetness. Perhaps, he thought, Shuuichi would be interested in a little more play with whipped cream that night. He was glad Tohma and Mika weren't around to see the table interaction. Actually, he thought, let them watch. They obviously didn't think Yuki was as serious about Shuuichi as he was. Yuki's expression turned slightly sour again thinking about the earlier conversation.  
  
"No, Tohma. Maybe I'll be giving him the right idea. It's just not one I can express out loud." Yuki gulped down more beer and then starting talking again. "He's not a plaything Tohma. Hell, you treat him more like a plaything. You use him and me to advance sales for your company. What would you do if Shuuichi had never met me huh? Would you have so readily brought him under the NG label?"  
  
Tohma eyes turned serious. "It wasn't my idea in the first place. But I've never used him or you Eiri. How can you say something like that? And do you honestly believe there is a chance you and Shindou-kun would never have met?"  
  
Yuki faltered for a moment. It seemed almost unthinkable now. Unconceivable even. But yet, he had said it himself. What if he and Shuuichi had never met? He stood up quickly and tossed a couple of 1000 yen bills on the table. He was mad at Tohma, mad at Mika, for having brought up this stupid topic in the first place. And he was mad at himself for not being able tell Tohma then and there what he felt deep down. What he had written down so eloquently in his dedication. There was a force that had brought Shuuichi into his life. Why couldn't he admit it out loud? WHY?! He stormed away from the table and went out to the elevator in order to meet back up with Shuuichi. It was at that moment that Shuuichi had come bouncing through the elevators and started stepping on his feet. But he honestly hadn't felt any pain. It was more like physical comfort while he silently pondered in his mind why he couldn't be as honest verbally as he wanted. It made him feel weak emotionally, so he hadn't said anything to Shuuichi as they walked into the restaurant. ------  
  
Shuuichi noticed his lover's face had turned angry again. Had he done something wrong? He pulled back just a little and motioned for the check to be delivered. After paying, they took the elevator back down to the ground floor and left the department store. Shuuichi had already seen everything and Yuki seemed to want to return home quickly. Shuuichi insisted that they take a cab "because of the sidewalks" but Yuki knew it was for his sake. Once they got into their blissfully warmer apartment, Yuki grabbed himself a beer out of the refrigerator and locked himself up in his office. Shuuichi took that as his cue to be as quiet as possible for a while. He bundled himself up with some blankets and his Christmas pillows on the couch and turned on the TV. Every channel had some sort of Christmas special. Christmas anime specials, Christmas karaoke shows, Christmas news stories, Christmas cooking how-to's. Shuuichi flipped from channel to channel without paying much attention. Every so often he'd look at the door wondering if Yuki would walk through it. Unfortunately, it never happened and Shuuichi fell fast asleep hugging his blanket tightly, dreaming of coffee, strawberries, an ashtray that had remained strangely unused, whipped cream, and a smiling Yuki.  
  
Next Track: Brothers With Similar Tastes  
  
Major Changes and Notes: Christmas Cake is a Japanese Christmas tradition. It's a white frosted cake with strawberries on top. It's really cute looking! Changed the type of restaurant since it seemed unlikely that a French restaurant would serve Italian food being that it's fine dining and all. 


	5. Brothers With Similar Tastes

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 5: Brothers With Similar Tastes  
  
Light started to filter through the windows, marking the start of a new day. Some errant beams struck the sleeping face of Shuuichi, which made him turn over. "Just a little more... please... just a...zzzzz". Shuuichi muttered something incoherently in his sleep. Yuki glanced over at him wondering just what Shuuichi wanted a little more of. It made him feel just a touch guilty, but he decided to ignore that dangerous feeling and get back to the task at hand. He had opened a box of tinsel and was now trying to remove a couple threads. Instead, the whole package came out. Yuki looked at it with disgust and put the whole glob of tinsel on the tree as it was. Yuki stepped back to take a look at his handiwork. It was hideous; an absolutely atrocious mixture of colored lights, little round bulbs, and one giant glob of tinsel. Yuki sighed and decided if Shuuichi wanted, Shuuichi could fix it himself. He stuck an angel on the top of the tree. A couple days ago he had gone back to Tower 54 and taken a look at the tree Shuuichi had talked about during lunch. It screamed innocence and loveliness and Yuki realized there would be no substitute for Shuuichi. So he had bought an angel just like it at one of the many Christmas stores, along with a single string of colored lights and a box of red bulbs.  
  
Yuki couldn't remember the last time he had worked on a Christmas tree. Such things never carried any importance, and it seemed like a big waste of money for something that was around only for a few days during December. In addition, it had been hard finding a tree this late in the season. Yuki originally planned on getting an artificial tree. Live trees were more expensive, a pain to maintain, and would leave little needles all over the floor of his perfectly clean living room. However, it seemed to be these little things that Shuuichi cared about most, and Yuki would be damned if he didn't do something right for the little creature that was now snoring on the couch. So Yuki had settled for a 6-foot tall live tree that came with free tinsel. He could understand now why the tinsel was free.  
  
Yuki sat down on the dark colored sofa next to the head of his lover. He looked so cute and needy when he was asleep. Pretty much the exact same way he looked when he was awake. Yuki gently ran a couple fingers through Shuuichi's hair. They had taken a shower together the night before and Shuuichi's hair still smelt of the conditioner he regularly used. It was slightly floral and made Shuuichi's hair as soft as his soul. As Yuki lovingly played with his hair, Shuuichi mumbled once again. "There.... no.... Yu... no....Chu?" Yuki decided daydreaming time was over. He roughly grabbed the back of Shuuichi's tank top and pulled him up into sitting position.  
  
"Yuki..... why do you have to be so" Shuuichi stopped talking as his eyes opened and adjusted not just to the light, but to the sight in front of him. "Yuki!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"It's a tree!"  
  
"I know that you idiot." Yuki stood up from the couch and walked into the kitchen. Shuuichi kept his blanket wrapped around him and followed into the kitchen. Yuki had dropped a piece of bread into the toaster and was looking in the refrigerator for some milk.  
  
"Yuki... what is a tree doing in our living room?"  
  
Yuki frowned and replied tersely. "If you don't like it I'll"  
  
"No, no, Yuki, I love it. I..." Shuuichi turned around and walked out to stand in front of the tree. "It's pretty..... sad looking." Shuuichi picked up the big tangled mess of tinstle and turned around to show it to Yuki. "Ne... Yuki..."  
  
"Fix it yourself. If I had known you were going to complain about it"  
  
"No complaints here!" Shuuichi quickly put the glob back on the tree and ran into the kitchen to give Yuki a hug. "Ne, Yuki...."  
  
"Do you know how long it took me to find one of those stupid things?"  
  
"I love you." Shuuichi looked up at Yuki and then stuck his head firmly into Yuki's chest. Yuki stared down at his lover. He had called him his lover on national television. So why couldn't he now, in private, repeat something as simple as "I love you"? Yuki pried Shuuichi off of himself and continued to drink some milk out of the carton. As he went to take his toast out of the toaster, he cast a backwards glance at Shuuichi. Thankfully, Shuuichi didn't seem disappointed that Yuki hadn't said anything. Instead, Shuuichi had gone back out to the Christmas tree and was merrily reorganizing the lights and bulbs and gently untangling the mess of tinsel. Shuuichi knew the tree meant "I love you" right? Yuki sighed and took a bite of toast. It was burnt. He looked over at the toaster. Shuuichi had changed the settings again. Yuki tossed the burnt toast into sink and walked back out into the living room.  
  
The tree looked in much better condition than it had minutes ago. The colored lights were shining gleefully through the tinsel. Shuuichi was standing on his tippytoes trying to straighten the angel on the top. It was just a little too high for him to reach. Yuki went over to help when he heard a knock at the door followed by the sound of the door opening.  
  
"OI! Aniki! Shuuichi! Anybody home?" Tatsuha peered his head into the living room and smiled. "Hey cool, a tree. Oh, and even a present under it. Is that for me?" Tatsuha quickly kneeled under the tree. "Awwww, it's for Aniki." He frowned and stood back up. Yuki looked questioningly at the present which had suddenly appeared under the tree. Then he focused his attention back to Tatsuha.  
  
"What the hell are you doing in my apartment?" Yuki scowled at his younger brother. He was constantly coming and going as he pleased. Having Shuuichi in the house was an invasion of privacy already, but at least Shuuichi gave something in return. His brother was just a lousy freeloader.  
  
Tatsuha put on a fake sad frown and looked at Shuuichi. "Ne, Shuuuu, is this what they call tough love?" Shuuichi giggled and then realized his state of semi-undress. He made his quick exit down the hallway into the bedroom to change.  
  
"So, Aniki, I hear a certain Christmas Party is going on in a few days." Tatsuha started. He walked into the kitchen. "Ooo, toast!" He picked the burnt toast out of the sink and gave it a test bite. He made a face and tossed it back into the sink. Then he sat at the kitchen table. His older brother came into the kitchen and glared at him. Tatsuha decided not to notice.  
  
"I wanna go. Can I come? I mean, it's not like it'd be entirely weird for me to be there right? I mean, Mika-neesan is going to be there, and Tohma will be there, and you'll be there cause Mika-neesan threatened you. So do you think it'd be alright if I came?"  
  
"Why would you want" Yuki started but then a look of disgusted realization came across his face. "He's twice your age you sicko." Yuki turned around and walked out of the kitchen. His younger brother followed close behind. Tatsuha ran around in front of his brother and sat on the coffee table.  
  
"But he's GOD Aniki! GOD! Besides, age doesn't matter in true love. And you love Shuuichi, so how can it be wrong to have a little crush on..."  
  
"No."  
  
"But Aniki!"  
  
Yuki lit up a cigarette and took a few puffs. Then he started to smile. Tatsuha smiled in return filled with hope.  
  
"No."  
  
"ANIKI!!!"  
  
Shuuichi came back out into the living room wearing some tight black pants and an equally tight neon orange shirt that said "2 Cute 4 U". Yuki frowned. He had a love/hate relationship with those pants. During the day, they were a constant visible reminder of how Shuuichi felt about Yuki. But at night, they were troublesome. Yuki looked over at his younger brother and realized his brother was probably thinking the same things about the same pants.  
  
"GET OUT!" He yelled.  
  
Shuuichi tilted his head and began to tear up. "Did I do something wrong?"  
  
Yuki sighed. "Not you. Him." and he pointed with his cigarette.  
  
"Aniki.... honestly.... it's just a party! I promise not to do anything bad."  
  
Shuuichi cheered. "Tatsuha's coming to the party too? Did you know Sakuma-san is going to be there? I wonder if there will be karaoke and games."  
  
Tatsuha sniffled and looked back at his brother. "See Aniki? Shuuichi thinks it's okay."  
  
There was no reply. Instead Yuki walked past Shuuichi down the hall and locked himself in his office.  
  
"YAY! I can go!" Tatsuha smiled and hugged Shuuichi. "Ne, Shuuichi, do you think Sakuma-san would wear pants like that?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Nevermind. See ya later!" Tatsuha waved goodbye, leaving Shuuichi to ponder what to do next. He couldn't go back to sleep now. Yuki was in his office. There wasn't any reason to go to NG Records. So Shuuichi settled on sitting under the Christmas tree looking at the present from him to Yuki. It was wrapped in a simple store wrapping paper with a small gift tag on top. However, the wrapping paper was merely a decoy. Shuuichi had made the gift himself, with a little help from Hiro.... and Fujisaki.... and some of the people at the department store. But it was a thoughtful, handmade gift that would truly remind Yuki of what he meant to Shuuichi. He couldn't wait for Yuki to open it. Just three more days.  
  
Next Track: It's Not My Party But I'll Cry If I Want To  
  
Original Author's Notes: Most stores in Japan have their own wrapping paper that can be used to wrap gifts. It is customary to leave the gift in this store wrapped form when you give a gift to someone else. This little episode is kinda filler, but also mirrors one of the many interesting aspects of "Gravitation". Tatsuha is like Yuki and Shuuichi is like Ryuuichi... it seems that while they may not get along and agree, they are certainly brothers with similar tastes. I also just wanted to make some more warm fuzzy Yuki moments after rereading volume 11 again. 


	6. It's Not My Party But I'll Cry If I Want...

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 6: It's Not My Party But I'll Cry If I Want To  
  
The soft yellow floor marker on the elevator slowly rose. 3...5...10... until it got to Floor 14, where there was a loud party already in progress. Shuuichi and Yuki were a good 45 minutes late. This time it wasn't because Yuki had locked himself up in his office. This time it was Shuuichi's fault. He had misplaced his gift for Sakuma-san and had been frantically searching the apartment for it. The small present had been hiding under one of Shuuichi's Christmas pillows, which gave Yuki an excuse to complain once again about "Shuuichi-clutter". After that, Yuki's car wouldn't start because of the cold. So they ended up having to call for a cab. Normally Yuki would have just let himself get angry and stay at home. But...tonight was going to be different. Tonight was going to be special. Tonight was a day Shuuichi had been looking forward to. Yuki pulled a cigarette from the pack in his pocket and lit up. A few puffs later he was relaxed and ready.  
  
Shuuichi had bolted out of the elevator and was already starting to make the rounds. All the members of Bad Luck were present, as well as Ayaka-chan, and Seguchi-san, and Mika, and Noriko with her husband and daughter, and K and Sakano-san, as well as many other support staff members from NG and members of other bands under the NG label. Ryuuichi was conspicuously absent. Shuuichi shrugged, reasoning his idol was just a bit late. Shuuichi went from group to group wishing everyone a Merry Christmas. He was about to go wish Hiro and Ayaka-chan a Merry Christmas as well when he saw somebody sitting alone on a chair at the far edge of the room.  
  
"OI! Tatsuha!" Shuuichi went running over to his young friend. "What's up? Er...." Shuuichi paused and leaned over. "Ne... Tatsuha... why are you crying? It's supposed to be a fun party."  
  
Tatsuha sniffled again and grabbed Shuuichi, pulling him onto his lap and sobbing into Shuuichi's green floor-length jacket. "SHUUUUUUUU!!! I'm such a loser!"  
  
Shuuichi's eyes widen a little. He tried to turn around to face Tatsuha. "Eh? No you aren't. What's the matter? It's not like you to cry." Shuuichi blinked his eyes cutely and smiled, trying to cheer him up.  
  
It didn't work. Tatsuha continued to cry. "But I am Shuu, I am!! Noriko-san especially took me over to say hi to Ryuuichi-san and I got so flustered and embarrassed I ended up spilling some of my wine on Kumagorou so Ryuuichi-san left with Kumagorou to get him cleaned about a half hour ago and they haven't come back yet and I'm such a loser Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu." Tatsuha continued to sob and his words got faster and more slurred together.  
  
"There there Tatsuha, I'm sure it's not a big deal. He doesn't care about those things really."  
  
"But he got so sad and started crying and running around screaming wondering where the nearest bunny cleaner was!"  
  
"Oh." Shuuichi wondered what a bunny cleaner was and then noticed his lover standing above him looking rather cross. "Hi Yuki!"  
  
"I come to this stupid party for you and you run off and end up sitting on my brother's lap. Give me one good... no.... one REALLY good reason why I shouldn't leave now." Yuki took another aggravated puff off his cigarette.  
  
Shuuichi immediately jumped off Tatsuha's lap. "Um.... well, Tatsuha was crying and I was trying to cheer him up and..."  
  
"Sitting on somebody's lap is necessary to cheer them up?"  
  
"Um... no... but...." Shuuichi looked down at the carpet trying to think of a really good reason. Thankfully Tatsuha provided one for him.  
  
"There is free alcohol here. And your publishing editor can't reach you here. It's a cell free zone." Tatsuha stopped sniffling and looked up at his older brother. Yuki looked only mildly impressed by that reasoning, but he didn't say anything. Tatsuha started complaining to his older brother about the situation, but Yuki didn't listen to any of it.  
  
"Let's go Shuuichi." he said bluntly and grabbed Shuuichi to make his point clear.  
  
"But..."  
  
Yuki's look said everything. So they left Tatsuha to continue crying to himself and began to make the rounds once more. Mainly that meant Shuuichi saying "Merry Christmas" and Yuki remaining perfectly silent. Shuuichi couldn't understand why Yuki wasn't even trying to enjoy himself. He looked tense, like he was waiting for something bad to happen. He decided maybe Yuki just needed to sit down and relax a moment. He led Yuki over to a couch near the Christmas tree and told him to wait. He'd come back with a beer soon.  
  
Yuki leaned back into the deep couch cushions and noticed Tohma and Mika making small talk with some clients Tohma had invited. He was almost glad Mika had married Tohma. There didn't seem to be anything between them, but Tohma provided the things Mika wanted: money and material goods. In exchange, Mika provided Tohma with the things he needed: a token wife and close access to Yuki. Yuki lit up another cigarette and cringed. It was rather disgusting how Mika was a pawn in exchange for something so small and earthly. He actually hoped more for her. She was his sister after all. Yuki looked over at the Christmas tree. It was taller, fuller, and more decorated than the tree in his apartment. Yet, Shuuichi hadn't said anything about the tree here to Yuki. Yuki took that as a sign that he liked the smaller tree better and allowed himself a small smile of satisfaction.  
  
"Ne, Yuki, whatcha smiling about?" Shuuichi had returned, wearing a floppy Santa hat, with Yuki's beer and sat down on the couch next to Yuki.  
  
"This." He took a gulp of beer from the glass Shuuichi had brought.  
  
"Liar." Shuuichi's eyes sparkled and he smiled wide.  
  
"What?" Yuki half-choked and spit up some of the beer. Shuuichi never talked back quite like that before! He looked half mad and half puzzled at Shuuichi only to feel a warm presence just below his lips. Then he noticed a mostly empty glass of wine in Shuuichi's other hand. Yuki took the glass and put it on the side table. He didn't want Shuuichi plastered when he opened his Christmas present. Tonight was too special for that.  
  
"You had a little drop..." Shuuichi just giggled and then looked at the Christmas tree. He was about to comment about the star on the top of the tree when Tohma stood in front of the tree to make an announcement.  
  
Tatsuha continued to sniffle and feel sorry for himself. He even thought about leaving the party. There was no way he could face his idol after what he had done. He had defiled the pink bunny he idolized. Tatsuha wanted to be that pink bunny. It was always near his idol. His idol cared more about that bunny than money or power or girls. Tatsuha sniffled again and noticed a little pink plush paw waving in front of his face.  
  
"Ne, Tatsuha-kun, don't cry." said a slightly falsetto voice. "I'm all clean now see? Good as new!" A previous stained paw was now the same wonderful candy pink shade as the rest of his body.  
  
"I... I'm really... I'm really sorry about what happened earlier Sakuma-san." Tatsuha stuttered out.  
  
Ryuuichi tilted his head a little. "You didn't do anything to me" he said in a puzzled childish voice.  
  
"Oh! Ah, I mean..." Tatsuha turned his head towards the pink bunny. "I'm really sorry about spilling wine on you earlier Kumagorou. Can you forgive me?"  
  
Ryuuichi smiled and voiced a small cheer. "Kumagorou says of course he'll forgive you, but only if you keep him company some more tonight! Kumagorou likes you!"  
  
Tatsuha smiled. "Of course! I'd love to!" He nearly fainted with joy. A night with his idol... his idol wanted to spend time with him... It was the best Christmas ever in his short 16-year life.  
  
Ryuuichi grabbed Tatsuha by the arm off the chair. "Let's go look at the Christmas tree! OH LOOK! Tohma is about to make a speech Kumagorou!"  
------  
  
"Thank you everyone for coming. You have worked very hard this year. We continue to expect chart-topping hits from our bands. Nittle Grasper continues to be as strong as ever and a lot of effort has been put into managing the many other talented artists we have under our label. As your president, and also a member of Nittle Grasper, I thank you for your hard work this year. Right now I'd like to take this time to allow people to exchange gifts," Shuuichi could swear Seguchi-san was looking at Yuki with a slightly challenging look, "and please continue to enjoy the evening. There is plenty more sake and beer and liquor at the bar as well as refreshments along the back table." Tohma walked over and grabbed a small present from underneath the tree. He presented it to Mika, who graciously smiled, playing the perfect role of executive's wife. Yuki muttered something low about token wife again and took another sip of beer, looking in the total opposite direction of Tohma and Mika. Shuuichi decided Yuki needed some cheering up. Plus, he couldn't possibly wait any longer.  
  
He crawled up near Yuki and gave him a little kiss on the neck. Then he whispered into Yuki's ear. "I got you something." Yuki didn't react at all, so Shuuichi ran to the tree and came back with the small present that had been sitting underneath the tree in their apartment. "Here! Open it." Shuuichi said cheerfully. It had taken him awhile to put it together. He watched as Yuki slowly put his beer down on the floor and watched as Yuki slowly put his cigarette out. Then he watched as Yuki took the present out of his hands and inspected it slowly. Yuki turned it over and looked at the wrapping paper. "You got me something from the bookstore?" Yuki looked rather displeased (like normal) but Shuuichi thought he could detect just a little bit of... disappointment in that voice? Shuuichi giggled again and flung himself across his lover's lap, the Santa hat falling to the floor.  
  
"OPEN IT!" He said loudly and suddenly everyone was watching. All eyes were on Yuki and Shuuichi as they sat on the couch. Yuki felt trapped. He didn't like being in the limelight like this, but if he didn't open the present or if he even moved to get up, Shuuichi would have been incredibly hurt in his continuing drunken state. Why couldn't Shuuichi just be a little bit more thoughtful. Even the gift, wrapped in paper from the bookstore they had passed over a week ago, didn't show much thought. He realized... he was feeling disappointed. He knew how Shuuichi thought about him, didn't he? Yuki suddenly felt like he was questioning everything again. If Shuuichi didn't love him, then there could have been a chance that they'd never have met. The question Tohma had posted days ago ringed in his ears.  
  
To escape the reality of his thoughts, he opened the present. However, instead of being a book, or even anything from the bookstore, it was a personally made CD-ROM. "Merry Christmas Yuki!" was the title and there was a tiny caricature of Shuuichi wearing a Santa hat. It was adorable. Yuki smiled and then frowned.  
  
"What's this?"  
  
"What do you mean what's this?" Shuuichi replied. "It's a CD!"  
  
"I can see that!"  
  
"Exactly, but you can't see what's inside it right?" Shuuichi smiled brightly. He sat up and bit Yuki's ear just slightly, dropped his voice about an octave, and whispered "You'll have to wait until we get home."  
  
Yuki took a deep breath and breathed out a mixture of relief (Shuuichi did love him) and anxiousness (he couldn't wait any longer). He grabbed Shuuichi strongly by the wrist and then gently kissed the under side. He gave it several light, sweet kisses (all while listening to Shuuichi giggle), then started moving up from the wrist to the palm and fingers. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Tohma and Mika watching. Let them watch, he thought. This was his moment.  
  
"Shuu," he said using the familiar nickname everyone used but himself. "I made you something too."  
  
Next Track: Confessions 


	7. Confessions

Introductions and Disclaimers from Tenshi  
"Gravitation" and all its characters belong to the talented Maki Murakami. I originally wrote and posted this story here in 2001 in the span of a few days and thought I'd clean it up a bit in preparation for Nanowrimo this year. I hope you enjoy it even though it's just a quick write sort of thing! It's pure fluffiness Gravitation style.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation"  
Track 7: Confessions  
  
The world came back with crystal clear clarity to Shuuichi. The fuzziness and gaiety of the wine was replaced with a crisp vision of each strand of his lover's blonde hair, each tiny fleck of color in his lover's equally blonde eyes, all repeating one word, which rung in his ears.  
  
"Shuu."  
  
Yuki... Yuki Eiri... the amazing novelist whose favorite word was "idiot" had called him  
  
"Shuu."  
  
His heart raced ever so slightly. He was scared. This wasn't Yuki. It couldn't be Yuki. Yuki never called him Shuu, much less.... what else had he said? Shuuichi realized that after he heard the nickname, he hadn't bothered listening to the rest of the sentence. Yuki was walking over to the Christmas tree and picking up a present. Did this mean Yuki had gotten him something? He was thrilled.... excited.... and still scared. Yuki had gotten him things before. But this was different. It was Christmas, and he had called him  
  
"Shuu."  
  
Yuki was now returning with the present. From this short distance, Shuuichi could see the wrapping paper. It wasn't store wrapping paper. Yuki.... Yuki must have wrapped it himself. Not only that... but Yuki... had bought wrapping paper. Shuuichi put a hand to his nose. Yuki had put effort into this. First he had gone shopping. Then he had gotten that interesting looking Christmas tree. And now... he was standing in front of Shuuichi proffering a present.  
  
"Open it." Yuki motioned once again to his lover. There was no harshness to his voice.  
  
Shuuichi took the package from Yuki, his hands and arms trembling slightly. He flipped the package over and put his finger underneath the edge. Slowly, he busted through the tape and pulled away the wrapping paper. Shuuichi didn't know what to expect, but it certainly wasn't this.  
  
"Ne, Yuki..." he said holding up a copy of Yuki's "Tension". "I thought you said I wouldn't like this."  
  
"You won't. It's about girls and lovers who kill each other and forced sex and there are no color pictures for you to look at." Yuki flashed one of his devilish smiles at Shuuichi. Oddly, that comforted Shuuichi somewhat. He was acting normal again. This was just like Yuki to give him something weird and somewhat thoughtless. He was about to put the book to the side when Yuki kneeled before him and looked straight into his eyes.  
  
"Read the dedication."  
  
Now Shuuichi was nervous again. Why would he want him to read the dedication? He opened the book and saw a half page dedication, with a title he didn't fully comprehend. Shuuichi forced his body to breathe in and then he began to read.  
  
"A Dedication to Gravitation" came the trembling voice. He continued. "A force we cannot see, nor smell, nor taste, nor touch, nor hear. A force that keeps the stars in the heavens. A force that keeps the sun and moon and earth in perfect alignment and balance. A force that must have been created by the heavens, because of its amazing power." Shuuichi's voice got softer and softer, trembling more and more. "It brings rain and snow to the earth from the skies. It brings..." Shuuichi couldn't find it in himself to continue reading. He looked up at Yuki, his eyes filled with tiny tears.  
  
Yuki closed the book and gently kissed one of Shuuichi's hands. Then he began to recite from memory. "It brings..."  
and all eyes in the room were on the writer turned poet, and the singer turned mute.  
  
------  
  
Outside a small apartment in Tokyo, the snow began to gently fall. Inside the small apartment, in an office down a long hallway, a new black desk and black chair was set up in its proper position. On top of that desk was an ashtray, an empty can of beer, and a Sony Vivo laptop. In the laptop, a CD whirred in the disc drive and images of Shuuichi and Yuki's history flashed on the monitor like a slideshow. A blown up picture of the purikura they had taken together. A image taken from the newspaper when Yuki had called Shuuichi his lover. In the background played some soft gentle music that Yuki could listen to while he wrote. In a previous, almost unimaginable life before Yuki, Shuuichi had played keyboard as well. It was neither the most beautiful nor the most talented sounds ever created, but they had been created with heart.  
  
Further down the hallway was a dark living room. A can of whipped cream was lying empty on the couch. The TV had been left on and was silently displaying a choir singing "Joy To The World" in Japanese. The lights on the Christmas tree had been left on, still sparkling through some tinsel. And under that tree, rather than being the remnants of wrapping paper from opened presents, was a green floor length jacket. Followed by a black jacket, and a red sweater, and a white shirt, and a pair of black pants ripped open without patience, and some jeans unbuttoned lovingly. The clothes made a little trail back down the hallway stopping just outside one of the remaining rooms in the apartment.  
  
Inside that room laid two men, gently but fiercely holding each other. The shorter one had his head lying on his lover's head with his eyes closed. They were tired, spent, over-heated, but in no way wishing to escape the heat pouring into them. The taller one was quietly reciting.  
  
"It brings tears from my eyes. It brings readers to my books. And it brings lovers together that would never have found each other otherwise. For these reasons, I dedicate my book to gravitation, a force I cannot and will not live without." He gently kissed the head of his shorter lover.  
  
"Ne, Yuki." came the reply.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Say it again."  
  
"That's the fourth time already."  
  
Shuuichi giggled. He looked up and noticed a fine crystal powder falling outside, a tribute in two ways.  
  
"Ne, Yuki."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You are kind of like snow, you know that?" Shuuichi felt his lover tense slightly. He gave him a gentle squeeze and kiss on the chest to let him know it wasn't a bad thing.  
  
"Snow..." he continued "can be cold. It can be harsh. But it can also be soooooooooo warm." Shuuichi closed his eyes and enjoyed the warmth that was flooding into him. He gently kissed his lover's chest again and then let one of his hands start to wander again. It settled on a sensitive area just near where the thigh met the hip. "Snow can also be soft. But it can also be sooooooooooo hard." Shuuichi giggled and looked up to wink at his lover.  
  
"Idiot" but it was said lovingly and with a slight chuckle.  
  
"Ne, Yuki, I love you."  
  
And tonight, there was no hesitation. There were no second thoughts. There were no barriers on heart or mind. There was only a whispered reply of "I love you too."  
  
He hoped tomorrow would be the same.  
  
The End  
  
Final Author Notes: I hope people reading this for the first time enjoyed it. This was my first Gravitation fanfic story and I had a lot of time writing it. It really flew by and I wanted to include as many characters as I could just to show my appreciation for the wonderful series! Thanks for reading. When doing this rewrite, I didn't want to change too much of the original content, just clean it up a tiny bit. It still reads like a quickly written piece of work but that's not really a bad thing... 


End file.
